The Adventures and Misadventures of Vacation 2014

I, Kienbock's Girl, have had several adventures and misadventures in the last few months.

My husband and I took my hard earned vacation time to go to Europe and spend time with our exchange daughter and her family. We planned since our daughter left us to visit her this year. Back in February, we bought tickets, and started planning a vacation that ended up taking the 4 months before to plan it out entirely ... and then of course we didn't stay on the schedule we created, but we never do as we add and delete as we go with the flow. So, we spent 2 lovely weeks with our daughter, and a week with her family. Overall, it was a very good vacation but I learned some things.

1. Always travel with the husband - do not fly alone.
2. Only fly with Iceland Air if you're going to Iceland. The seats are too tiny for a normal sized person let alone a 6'1" man with gigantic shoulders, they make you follow ridiculous overhead luggage sizes, and they don't feed you any food (you must pay) and give you drinks 2 times in an 8 hour flight.
3. When flying, attempt to find affordable seats in business or 1st class - or pay for a last minute upgrade if available.
4. When flying, even if the doctor tells you not to take it, take lots of ibuprofin. 
5. I sincerely dislike Belgium. Beautiful buildings, great history, but dirty/stinky cities with some poorly mismanaged transportation systems and no sense of direction combined with expensive food made it a little difficult to fall in love with. 
6. Always travel like a local. I mean, I already knew this, but I knew it even more since I'd never taken the train outside of Germany when living there. 
7. Our exchange daughter does not always like to go to many museums on vacation and spend a lot of time looking and reading everything like I do. Find her a bookshop and you're golden.
8. Buying laundry soap in the ghetto of a French speaking country is not exactly ideal.
9.  Don't let Belgian buses kidnap you. ENTER FROM THE FRONT - they're not the same as Germany!
10. Belgian fries really are better.
11. Vacation isn't a time to relax - it's a time to get out and do stuff!
12. Candlelight wine cruises through Amsterdam are fun. They're even more fun when they stop for a short tour of the Red Light District, and a couple mysteriously disappears from the remainder of the tour.
13. Buying tickets online to the Anne Frank Huis might look sketchy (trust me, it looks sketchy) but it was an EPIC WIN. 
14. No one is kidding about the line to the Anne Frank Huis. By the time we entered (1/2 hour before it opened, we got early entry!), the line queue was around the building, and halfway down another block ... so an easy 2 hour wait minimum. By the time we exited, I'd estimate it was probably 2 city blocks long.
15. Speaking English isn't a crime or shocking to anyone in Belgium or the Netherlands. In fact, so much more English is spoken there than in Germany or any other country we've traveled to, it was like Spanish in America. Except that everyone could understand you ... and most Americans' Spanish is like baby talk. 
16. Take your internet capable phone with you. Even though you can't call people, you sure can e-mail or FaceBook them and post teasing pictures of you and your hubby and daughter.
17. Hotels in Bruges are cheap and SUPER nice.
18. Hotels in Brussels and Amsterdam are expensive and mediocre at best.
19. Renting an apartment in Brussels was kind of cool.
20. Renting an apartment in Brussels was kind of not so cool. 
21. If you forget to eat an unopened sandwich that you bought on the plane, the U.S. sniffer dogs will find it, and get you in trouble and have all your things looked through just to throw the sandwich away ... the sandwich that cost you about $12.

I'm sure there's more I could put here, but let me just say it was a vacation we'll never forget, and believe me when I say we took thousands of photos to prove just that. 

Christmas Vacation - Part I

The morning after my in-laws arrived, we packed up and headed out for a Christmas vacation. Since my husband was lucky enough to finally get time off, we planned a whole big hoopla for J & S. We had rented a car (ours was acting up and in the shop) and piled it high with our suitcases, bags, and snacks.

We headed out that morning around 7am in order to get to the very famous medieval walled city of Rothenburg ob der Tauber. If you go anywhere in Germany, you're likely to hear about Rothenburg. Its fame makes it incredibly touristy so we decidedly missed the usual rush of spring through fall and went in the winter when it was snowy and perfectly un-crowded. I had been to the city in the summer and in the fall - both seasons were gorgeous. Winter did not disappoint. We went to the famous Jakobskirche - a Lutheran church that is now used primarily for concerts but is famous for its original stalls, altarpiece, and hand-carved wooden alter to the blood of Jesus Christ. It's this amazing work of art that depicts the last supper, all wood and hand carved from the 1400s, and is said to have a stone on the crucifix that holds a drop of Jesus Christ's blood.

Now, I've been to Rothenburg several times and it really is a good value despite what people say. Every time we go there, we go to this church. It's so breathtakingly beautiful that you can't help but sit up at the altar and gaze in amazement that somebody was that talented. J & S of course loved the church. As usual, my husband took a million photos. We have several hundred of this church alone. It might cost 2 Euro per person to get it, but it is totally worth it. Besides, the money goes to the restoration of the church. It was bombed out during World War II and is slowly being restored to its original state. Some things survived like the altar of the holy blood, and the stalls, etc.

After we oohed and aahed in the church, we wandered around the town which has lots of trinket-y shops and little cafes and such. Since it was Christmas, they also had a Christkindlsmarkt - the German term for the traditional Christmas market that is usually found in squares around cities during the month of December. The tradition was started in Germany and Austria, and is big in much of central and western Europe.

Being ill was not pleasant during this outing. We took J & S to the medieval crime and punishment museum - which we've been to many times. I remember feeling the throbbing pain of the metal and the holes in my arm. The entire time we were in the museum, I looked pallid and felt miserable. At least it's a fun museum though. Thumb screws, dunking cages and iron maidens galore await your senses. It's fun to learn about medieval crime and punishment I tell you!

We also visited the famous Kaethe Wohlfahrt Christmas village. It's this famous store - the biggest Christmas store in Europe or something, and they are famous for their ornaments. They're open year round, and you can get some of the most amazing things there. Every year we bought ornaments from Kaethe Wohlfahrt for every family member. J & S LOVED the store. We spent an hour in there dawdling and looking at all the beautiful things to buy. It was really hard for me to be in that store looking back on it. I love to pick things up and handle them in stores. I couldn't even pull the strings on the traditional wooden dancing ornaments. It was disappointing. I'm very hands-on when it comes to many things, and shopping is just no fun with a gimp arm. I think I still enjoyed myself though, and I didn't get too crabby that I remember.

Well, I didn't get too crabby until the bathroom incident. They had a special bathroom set up in the middle of town because the regular public restrooms were blocked by all the market stands. So, we all decide we need to go. I managed to stuff my fat cast arm into my brand new Columbia winter coat. I was decked out that day with long underwear (it was below freezing outside), jeans, boots, gloves, a big fat sweater, a hat and a scarf. And, being Germany, they do not have a disabled restroom. This is common. Disabled persons aren't often out in public because they do not make public areas accessible to disabled persons. It's just a caveat of travel in Europe and it's typical. I go into the bathroom and they're tiny stalls. This means, that even if I needed help, I wouldn't get it. I'd had lots of bathroom mishaps since the surgery, and my husband couldn't be here to help me this time. Great. I take off the glove on my good hand, and leave the other glove that I stretched over my cast. It looks like I have a wooden arm. Seriously. Then, I manage to undo my belt and my pants (both layers) down, and do my business without any problem. When I try to re-suit up, it becomes an issue. I must have been in the stall a good 3 or 4 minutes just trying to get my pants done up and my belt on. No such luck, so I come out of the stall to wash my hand. All these ladies are pushing and shoving around the tiny sinks washing their hands. I just wait until there's a lull, and turn on the water, wash my hand as good as possible, then try to get a paper towel. I'm helpless trying to pull the paper towel out of its holder because I'm not left handed. I'm annoyed and say to the nearest woman "Koennen Sie mich helfen? Ich hab' nur ein Hand," which means "Can you please help me? I only have one hand."

By the time I had gotten out of the bathrooms, I had to ask my mother-in-law to do up my pants and belt. It would be no problem with my mother, but this was not my mother. I didn't feel comfortable having to ask that. Plus, it's kind of degrading to have to ask like a three-year-old for mommy to help you do up your pants. It hurt me. I wanted to be able to do the stuff I always could, that was a "no brainer".

After the bathroom, we went to a small cafe that overlooked the town and had coffee with cakes. I was still bothered. We were eating out in public and I could barely lift my coffee cup without spilling it with my left hand. Also, I had to share a streusel with my husband because it would take me forever to eat my own slice. For as upset as I was, I know I did a really good job of keeping my feelings and anger to myself. We were able to have a good time despite.

While there, we took lots of pictures, bought the famous Schneeballen (snowballs) which are pastry balls with toppings like chocolate or powdered sugar, walked the length of the medieval wall that surrounds the town, and shopped. It was a cold day, but I did the best I could making sure that I was enjoying my experience. After all, it wouldn't be fair to ruin my in-laws' first visit to Europe ever just because I was suffering from post-surgery pain and woes. Depressed as I was, I braved being as normal as possible that day. Soon however, it would catch up to me.